Ever been to the Crate & Barrel in San Francisco’s Union Sqaure? How about the CB2 around the corner? If you’ve shopped at either one of these stores, you’re probably wondering the same thing that I am: Do straight couples no longer buy furniture in San Francisco? Seriously! Whenever I’m shopping at one of those two stores, I see pair after pair of gentlemen friends with perfectly trimmed hair and meticulously fitted jackets, jeans, and tops. Oh! And great posture, too. I see them gathered in twos around the staged living room sets, murmuring between themselves about color and custom fabrics. I want to ask them for help–for their expert opinions about whether or not they think the Oslo dining table would go well in a dining room with dark blond wood floors, Benjamin Moore iceberg color walls and mahogany wood trim around the doors. To them I wish to say:

Oh, well-dressed men with great haircuts and Oliver Peoples eyeglasses, if you bestow on me your wisdom, then my dining room might exhibit such classic-yet-contemporary, smart-but-understated style that you might well mistake it for your own.

Ajuan Mance